7 Adorable Hobbies Of Famously Terrifying People
Life is full of surprises and it is often from the most
unexpected sources. A hobby by definition is an activity done regularly in
one's leisure time for pleasure which surprises us why masturbation doesn’t fit
within that handful of a definition. We all have hobbies but they are usually
in tune with an individual’s disposition. For instance if you are Donald Trump
most likely your hobbies would include being a broker on Mexico Wall Street.
There are some people though whom the world has grown to
associate nightmares with, whether in real life or just thespians who became
popular for scary roles, have hobbies so cute they’d fool you into thinking
they were Care Bears in their past lives….
Osama Bin Laden Was A Volleyball Terrorist
It’s been six years since Osama was finally captured, executed
and fed as dog food for sharks by US Navy Seals but when he wasn’t blowing
buildings, coming up with recipes on how to cook every American president's balls, jerking off to his extensive porn collection or fantasizing about Whitney Houston, Osama terrorized the
volleyball court. In a book titled, “In the Shadow Of Bin Laden, “ he is
described as having an extremely useful presence on the volleyball court.
"He's so tall that he doesn't need to jump up to do a smash," The
Sunday Times' quotes Nasser al-Bahri, one of the al-Qaida leader's former
bodyguards.
Bin Laden was also an avid football fan but never removed
his turban when playing either sport because the turban was his only defense in the event that America decided to avenge by flying a plane into him.
'If blowing s**t up doesn't work, we'll challenge America to a volleyball game.' |
The Undertaker Invests In Real Estate
All 80’s and 90’s babies are definitely familiar with the
Undertaker aka The Deadman. The legendary chilling wrestler who was the product
of many children’s (and some adults) nightmares including the idiot writing
this.
The Undertaker who is now retired lives life as Mark Callaway, invests in real estate. Along with his partner Scott Everhart, they invested in
the construction of a building in Colorado called The Calahart presumably because The Mortuary was a less attractive name. The building has an estimated value of over two million dollars and the name is a wacky combination of their last names.
Calaway does a lot of charity work under his organization,
the Zeus Compton Calaway Save the Animals, this is something he kept highly
secret to protect his WWE persona no one would have attended a charity event with The Undertaker as guest of honor.
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'Yes this is a charitable event....you'll be giving....YOUR SOULS! |
Idi Amin was one of the world’s most brutal dictators who
later in death became a victim of Forest Whitaker’s portrayal of his brutal
self. Amin’s official title was His Excellency President for Life, Field
Marshal Al Hadji Doctor Idi Amin, VC, DSO, MC, CBE, Lord of all the Beasts of
the Earth and Fishes of the Sea, and Conqueror of the British Empire in Africa
in General and Uganda in Particular….somewhere within thatridiculous title he
should have included Watcher of Tom And Jerry then we’ll sit back and giggle
and watch you attempt that tongue twister. Idi Amin was reportedly a huge fan
of cartoons, Tom and Jerry to be more precise. According to one of his many
sons, Jaffir Amin, Tom and Jerry was his favorite.
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'Give me ten minutes to finish watching Tom and Jerry.' And now for our commercial break.... |
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'We know you don't like ads but f**k you. Unless you want to adopt starving African comedians, we have bills to pay too, tickets available here. Payment via EcoCash on +263 779 822 504.' |
Al Capone Wrote Love Songs
Al Capone rose through the ranks of a mob Chicago to
notoriously become one of the most infamous criminals to walk this earth. His life of crime finally ended on October 18
1931 when he was caught for the lamest crime of all, tax evasion and sent off to Alcatraz.
There he worked on one of his little known hobbies, writing s**tty love songs. Capone had an
affinity for music for the longest time even before he was put behind bars. He
had an extensive and remarkable collection of Italian opera records and during his
mob days he controlled the rising Chicago Jazz scene. He loved music so much that he would kidnap talented jazz playing niggas to play at his parties.
While in prison Capone joined the Rock Islanders,Alcatraz’s version of Maroon 5 and we definitely know Capone wasn't Adam Levine in this picture. He wrote a song titled Madonna Mia, a love ballad whose lyrics were signed by Capone in pencil.
It is widely believed that the song is a dedication to Capone’s wife or the guy who wifed him in prison.
Lou Ferrigno’s Cute Beanie Baby Collection
Lou Ferrigno was the man who turned green without any envy
at all. He was the star of the 1978-1982 Incredible Hulk television series that
made 70’s and 80’s babies shit their wide flare jeans and whatever kinda jeans
80’s kids wore. That’s really all the “star of anything” Ferrigno would become.
After the Hulk he became less famous for a very cute hobby.
Ferrigno loves to collect Beanie Babies and even has a strategy for collecting
the good shit, “It’s a matter of being at the right place at the right time to
get good ones,” and if he happens to show up at the right place, wrong time, he
can still turn into the Hulk and tear you in half so don’t fuck with his
Beanies. Geez, must have been The
Incredible Beanie Bulk in his past life.
'I know it's just paint but it was enough to scare you when you were a kid wasn't it?!' |
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'I finally found Jesus and these cute doll thingies with beans in them.' |
Paul Bearer Was A Ringside Photographer
If you’re a wrestling fan then you’ll remember Paul Bearer,
that creepy dude who managed that even creepier dude called the Undertaker who is on this list as well and
later on a partially creepy dude called Kane. Unknown to most though Paul’s
career grew out of a hobby as a ringside photographer when he was a teenager.
When he was around 15 or 16 years, then known by his government name, and probably less fat, William
Moody would show up at the Mobile Civic Center and numerous other venues to
take photos of Gulf Coast Wrestling.
You could say he was a creepier version of Peter Parker. His
love for taking photos earned him a reserved seat at these events which
attracted record breaking attendances of up to 10,000 people. After snapping
away for years, Moody finally got his big break in the ring in 1974. We are not sure which year he got that golden urn.
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'No you can't have this!...this is where I keep the souls of the producers of The Biggest Loser!' |
Freddy Krueger The Surf Dude
Robert Englund boasts of a career that includes seventy five
feature length films and four television series but the only f**kin' thing we know him for is playing Freddy Krueger, that dude with nothing better to do than kill kids in their nightmares in the Nightmare On Elm Street movies.
When he isn't killing kids in their nightmares, Krueger goes surfing. As a child, his grandfather died leaving their family
with an apartment in Laguna Beach, California. Englund would watch the cool
older boys surf and this is where his love for the sport developed. Initially
he started surfing so he could be one of the cool surfer dudes, he would beg
his sisters’ boyfriends to teach him and as soon as he was on that surf board
he learnt quickly since he was already a decent swimmer and a future sadistic psychopath child killer.
'You will die....unless you lend me your surf board.' |
I know you forgot to brush your teeth but don't forget to follow me on twitter or better yet like my page and I'll stalk the s**t out of you on Facebook.
Let me know what you think right here!
ReplyDeletePlease put the correct picture of idi amin not his film actor
ReplyDeleteThanks for the observation and comment, just that I used that picture for comical purposes...him holding up his hands to look like he's saying what's in the caption.
DeleteBoy, am I glad that I wasn't the only one terrified of the undertaker.
ReplyDeleteThere's plenty of us!
Delete